What happens when you let go

I always wondered what would happen if I just decided to let things go.

Tonight, dinner turned into a really great science experiment. Lucas is into anything related to weather right now. Yesterday we watched a DVD about weather and in it was a cool experiment on cloud formation. A scientist did something or another in a metal drum and added liquid Nitrogen to form an abundance of "clouds" in the room.

We discovered tonight that you don't need the nitrogen. Just an over-heated pan, a frozen shrimp stir-fry dinner, and Chris. There was a layer of clouds hovering close to the ceiling throughout the kitchen and amazing plumes of steam rising from the pan. The picture doesn't do it justice. This is after the clouds had fallen and filled the room in a fog. (You will have to really zoom in to see Chris.)

Lucas also inadvertently conducted a food experiment. So far, cheese that has been out for three days is safe to eat! Chris packed him a lunch on Wednesday that he left at school. But today, he remembered it! When I asked him what he had for lunch (Paul's mom, Ginny thought she would be feeding him at her house) he said a muffin, apple, crackers and cheese. At crackers, I realized what had happened. "It was white cheese. And even better than the kind we have at home!" He likes aged cheese like I do.

The good thing about letting go, is that you care much less about such things!

Day 4

It's so easy to blog when you can write all you've done in a day in a couple of paragraphs. Today I slept, read, and Internet window shopped in the morning. Chris's dad "Papa" picked Lucas up from school and took him out to Fellini's. When they came home, one of the many things they did was play Lucas's favorite board games (a recommendation of Paul's,) Richard Scarry's Busytown. Then Lucas came to my room, his new nap spot. I know Lucas was very happy to spend a special afternoon with Papa.

Meanwhile, I took my bedrest outside to a lounge chair in the sun. I'm a big fan of vitamin D and feel that the sun and breeze are so healing. Just hoping that I can soon add short walks to this new spa regimen.

But after Lucas's nap, the meltdowns began. I was waiting for this and now I'm glad he got it all out of his system.

First he was SO upset Papa had to leave. He was wet, groggy and very grumpy. So after letting him cry for a while, I offered him some of the banana and pumpkin breads Gigi made for us. Lately he has not been liking anything pumpkin and banana bread has also been off the list. But I convinced him to try it and Gigi's pumpkin bread was a huge success! So we bonded, chair scooted next to chair (briefly took my bedrest to the dining room table) and enjoyed the breads with tea.

Later we had a typical post-video meltdown which got out of hand and Lucas had to spend some time in his room. Again, he got out many tears of frustration (and underlying confusion I'm sure.) He emerged a new cleansed being and has been much more calm and focused ever since.

I'm starting to think that once a year (or better yet, quarterly) bedrest should be recommended for all pregnant women and mothers. It's amazing how each day I'm feeling more and more rested and am gaining new perspective into what is truly important. God help me put it into practice :)

Bed Rest, Day 3 (continued)

I thought Lucas might have been a bit traumatized seeing Mama in bed day after day, but what was I thinking? Tons of daddy time, playdates without me, grandparents around every corner...

Today Lucas went to Paul's house (a friend from school.) Ginny put them right to work. You can see just how upset Lucas is ;)





Chris is doing a fantastic job juggling work, shuffling Lucas off to school, preparing meals, doing laundry, grocery shopping, etc. This morning he urgently asked Lucas to put on his shoes (I seconded it from the bedroom) because they were running late. He didn't even lose his patience when returned to a shoeless but very focused Lucas spoon-feeding a stuffed animal. "I have to feed my baby every morning."

All the grandparents are pitching in too.

Yesterday my mom brought over dinner and made a chicken soup which I've been enjoying today.

My dad came over today and helped with things, and picked up a prescription (antibiotics, unrelated, I'm thrilled.) We sat on lounge chairs in the sun and sipped tea. We did not talk about Russian history (although he did try.) But I did get some good stories about the mining town in Ontario where he grew up (drawing a blank on the name now.) And as usual, I was entertained by his odd declarations. "I tell people a shot of vodka is much healthier than a glass of milk (so far we agree) because of all that bacteria (what?? never heard this as an argument against milk.)

I'm just lying around, meditating as I look out the picture window of my room. Thank goodness it is fall - beautiful! I collected some favorite bible verses of the amazing women of my church and reading them has been like a healing tonic. Next, I need to get into a good book. I'm just hoping I don't turn into a noodle by the time this week is over. I still need strength! 6 weeks to go til my due date and an energetic boy to keep alive! (Caught him just in time today - he was planning to stack a small stool on top of a large one in the master bathroom so he could see his face in the mirror. The downside of Montessori-instilled independence!)

Bed Rest, Day 3

I thought that completing the nursery would get me back into blogging again, but apparently that was not enough. Lying in my bed for three days however, seems to have done it!

Sunday, I stayed overnight at the hospital where they discovered a "marginal sinus tear" (in the placenta) the next morning. This is not the same as a partial placenta abruption, which can be much worse. Hopefully a week of bed rest will do it. And I plan to follow that up with a leisurely schedule which focuses primarily on my physical and spiritual well-being. Something I should have begun months ago!

One more thing on this little "scare" we had. I had asked earlier on for a spiritual pregnancy, thinking of sunshine and butterflies. And I have had some of that. But this has been the most spiritual moment of the pregnancy by far.

I never expected to be bleeding at 33 weeks. But the amazing thing is that I did not feel fear (Romans 4:6-9.) For a moment, I felt regret, wishing I had rested more and not sweated the small stuff so much. But I immediately thought of Christ on the cross and these feelings vanished.

Chris and I have been reading a book "The Jesus I Never Knew." If anyone wants to really understand Jesus, this is a powerful book. After changing into my hospital gown, as we were waiting for the nurse to come in, we prayed. For things that at the moment seemed impossible - for this to be a false alarm, for the baby to go to full term. But then Chris prayed and recognized how Christ was stern and abrupt with his disciples when their faith wavered. And at that point everything was in his hands.

Last Day of School

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We were so excited to have Lucas finish up his first year at Arbor Montessori. The tardiness of this post doesn't show it, I realize. Towards the end of the year, I could tell that Lucas needed a break. I was wondering if we had started school too early. But in the end, I think for Lucas (and for me!) it was the right decision. His best friend at school, Alexander (pictured above), definitely sweetened the deal for Lucas.

As soon as school finished, he burst forth with everything he had learned. He counted, out of the blue, to twenty-nine (except 15-17). And began singing many cute songs:

"When I was a young thing, not so long ago
I had to learn things I didn't even know
How to dress myself, tie my shoe, how to jump a rope
How to smile with a picture like a dope."

I am not sure where he got this last line. In general, just had a big mental growth spurt.

In the beginning of the summer, we reenacted the last week of school, over and over again. He was always Daddy and I was Lucas. He'd sit in a laundry basket and me behind him on a little bench. And after he buckled me in, he would drive me to school and then later pick me up after work. It would lead up to (although in the fantasy, the day would never actually arrive) the last day of school and the watermelon party, pictured here.

Gingerbread House

Christi, Jarrett and Elsa aren't the only ones having a white June. This morning, we finally got around to the gingerbread house Mia gave Lucas for Christmas. Lucas has been asking to do it for about 2 months now, regularly. It took me a little while to wrap my mind around it. The last one I did was tedious and the disappointment was great as I watched it come crumbling down with my niece's exuberant decorating style. (I'm just kidding Sierra.)

This one was much easier. The small size probably helped. Of course Lucas nibbled his way through the project then watched with awe as I sprinkled powdered sugar on top for the snowy finale.

Latest Lucasisms

I think we have reached a peak of hilarity.

At dinner after Daddy returned from an overnight trip to Alabama... "Daddy, what continent did you go to on your trip?"

"I love you Mommy. I love your foot, your chest, your legs, everything about you."

"I'm too tired to sit in the stroller. I need to walk."

"Are you thinking what I'm thinking?" After Lucas asked this, Chris said, "I don't know. What are you thinking?" Then Lucas drew a blank.

My mom (Mia) told Lucas a story about two nice mice, Pixie and Dixie, living in a hole in the wall and coming out occasionally to get cheese and get chased away by Jinx the cat. Lucas listened with a serous face. After the story was over, he said emphatically "NO. They did not live in our house. They died." Jinx was allowed to be in the house, but Pixie and Dixie were not welcome.

And Lucas's latest potty story:

"When I get older, I'm going to put a sink here (pointing), here, here and here. There gonna be sinks everywhere. Then, I'm going to paint this (pointing to bathtub area) red and put rainbows all around. And paint emergency vehicles everywhere.

Soon, a child's mommy is going to die. And I'm going to get a DeLorean. (At first I thought these two happenings were unrelated and certainly unrelated to the bathroom renovation.) I'm going to drive and pick up the child that mommy died and take him home. He's going to sit in the bathtub and look up and see the rainbows (at this point he gasped in delight, imitating the joy-filled orphan.)"

St. Augustine

Beware, long post ahead. It's just so hard to contain my love for St. Augustine...

We've been going to St. Augustine for years now. It started when I was looking for a Pilates certification program and the most suitable one I could find, in a city where I had any connections, was in St. Augustine, Florida. My connection is a family that I grew up baby-sitting for, who have let us stay in their quintessential beach home so many times. Every time we go, we fall in love with St. Augustine a little more.



Here is a view from their backyard which is on the bay. During this visit, we chatted with the neighbors more and for the first time realized that the next door neighbors home, is also an art gallery! So I treated myself to some pottery for my birthday.

The beach house is perfect...the vintage mirrors with painted flamingos, the cute play-doh sea-creature figurine gallery that Suzan and her daughter Amanda did years ago. Everything is so casual yet filled with love.

Here are a few pics of Lucas's first moments on the beach (about a 5 min drive from the house.)





The water was chilly so we played in the sand most of the time. Lucas was pretty rebellious during the trip and didn't want to be made to do anything he didn't want to do. At one point, I took a towel to wipe off all the sand that was on his face and mouth and mentioned I didn't want him to eat sand. So he picked up a handful, shoved it in his mouth and acted as if he liked it.

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Other than that, he was in his element on the beach. Sand castles, construction vehicles, shovels... Lucas loved adorning the castle tops with fallen reeds, spearing them like a mini-Mohican.

Almost as fun as going to the beach is riding bikes to the lighthouse. It's fun looking at all of the colorful florida homes with their lush tropical gardens. (I wish asparagus fern was perennial in Atlanta!) It's genuine Florida. Many are overgrown and need some TLC. Several have too many wind chimes and garden statues. But that is what I love about it!




On the lighthouse grounds, Lucas found some moss that he entertained himself with for quite some time. And on the way home we found a turtle in the middle of the road that we helped to cross the street.


One day my mom and I took a (LONG) walk into town. It was a beautiful, warm and breezy day. The Bridge of Lions, over the bay, is a sight in itself. But the views from it are indescribable. We even saw a dolphin playing in the water very near the docks and shore.

The last night, my handsome boys had a daddy-lukey evening on the beach...

Thank you Aunt Judy and Uncle Larry!

Chris's aunt and uncle, Judy and Larry sent Lucas a sweet homemade Valentine card with a Borders gift card tucked into it. We finally went to the store to redeem it. Of course we came home with cars! I tried to gently redirect him but in the end let him choose a Tonka book with 12 small cars and a play mat. I'm glad I did because it's a cute set and he loves it!

On the play mat is a minituare city - a school, firehouse, neighborhoods and hospital. He really gets into the zone, driving the cars around town. My mom had the police car stop for doughnuts. Then Lucas took the police car and it stopped for peanuts. Doesn't quite get it yet :)

Happy Birthday Uncle Sasha!

"Uncle Sasha, this is your birthday party!"

SONG:
"Have a happy birthday, yoo-hoooo.
(no clue what he's saying here)
Everybody play, it's Uncle Sasha's special day.
Happy Birthday!
Blow out the candles!
Hooooooo (blowing.)"

Happy Birthday Uncle Jon!

"HAPPY BIRTHDAY UNCLE JON!"


"Have a happy birthday, yooo-hooo
(forgot a line)
Everybody play...it's Jon's birth (correction special day)
Happy Birthday!
Blow out the candles!
Hooo (blowing)"

The Aquarium with James and Kate

Today's trip to the aquarium was definitely the most interesting one for Lucas so far. He sat for long periods of time taking in all the excitement happening in the tanks. I asked which was his favorite and he said "ALL of the animals are my favorite!" (My favorite exhibit was James blowing Raspberries and attacking his stuffed bear like a little shark.)

In the picture above, a toddler in a stroller next to him kept telling Lucas "NO!" just to get a reaction from him. He was authoritatively telling her "Don't DO that!" It was hilarious. I think he looks a bit like Jack Nicholson in the pic.

Learning Tower

In case you're wondering what a learning tower is...Lucas uses it to gain access to the counter top, sink or stove to help prepare food and I don't have to worry about him falling off.

Audrey

Some of you remember Audrey from a previous post (see second to the last quote from "More Lucasisms.)"

Apparently, Lucas and Audrey have been planning playdates at school. When I'd pick Lucas up from the playground he would confidently announce that Audrey was coming over. Then he'd get very agitated when I had to inform him otherwise. Of course something had to be done about this quickly, so I invited Audrey over to make muffins and play last week on a rainy afternoon. Cheryl had some things she had to take care of so it was just me and the kids.

This post would be five miles long if I typed all of the cute things that happened. But I will try to highlight the afternoon.

They were on cloud nine from the moment the door was opened. While pizza was cooking, they explored the house together through Audrey's eyes. Over lunch, the Syrian in Lucas came out and he was ordering more pizza for Audrey and telling her to drink her juice, etc.

They shared a spot on the learning tower and took turns mixing the muffin batter. As the muffins baked, Lucas hopped on his tricycle and pedaled off furiously like a little caveman while Audrey fluttered happily behind him. They raced to Lucas's room where they pretended that it was night and then raced out again pretending it was morning. This went on for quite a while, then they settled down to make "soup" (pictured above.)

Next they ate their whole wheat blueberry muffins, fulfilling one of Lucas's biggest dreams. He loves to hear stories about having a friend over for muffins(the friend varies depending on who is on our mind that day.)

We can't wait for more playdates with the "most wonderful girl in the world!"

Happy Valentine's Day!

Sending love to you all this Valentine's Day!

We got a last minute email from Lucas's school yesterday evening about bringing in 32 Valentines this morning. Lucas was already in bed so I rushed around preparing as best I could.

We happened to have some leftover Winnie-the-Pooh Valentines so I just had to make 16 more. I folded a heart and stuck a bug head on top so they look somewhat like a love bug. Then Lucas woke up early to personalize them, tracing or coloring hearts and putting an L on them for his signature (you can see a sideways L if you look closely at the Valentine sticking out of his pocket.)

Chris took him to school and helped him deliver one to each child's bag. Can't wait to open his bags and see all of his Valentines after school today! Chris said there were some fancy ones being handed out.

Octopus in the Woods

This is a potty-inspired story, almost verbatim:

Octopus in the Woods

"One day I was walking in a small patch of grass. Suddenly I realized I was in the woods. In a small distance I saw a owl. He said 'I was looking for you Lucas.' I said 'Oh, yes.'

Then mommy said 'Lucas, where are you??' She came to the woods and said 'Lucas I was looking everywhere for you.'

Then, in a small distance I saw a Octopus. I said (emphatically,) 'I am not your God. Jesus is your God."

Amen!

Lucas helps out

Didn't get a picture of this one, but I think it will forever be etched in my mind.

Yesterday when Lucas had completed his "I don't want dinner...I want to play" tantrum, he came out of his room and walked obediently to the bathroom to wash his hands.

Chris and I smiled and shared a moment parental pride over this new found independence. The other night he had gone to the potty by himself without waking us up. And he was washing his hands without our help during the day. We went to the dinner table to get our plates ready while Lucas finished up in the bathroom.

Pride cometh before the fall. I noticed that Lucas had been in the bathroom for quite a while. And then I heard a tinkling noise that I couldn't quite place.

The door was locked and my quick search for a skeleton key added to the anticipation. When I opened the door, this is what I found.

My normally orderly child was standing on his step-up stool in a dark room. His flashlight on the counter illuminated the waterfall that was flowing from the sink to a puddle on the floor. He was drenched. And one of his Toy Story slippers was floating like a boat in the miniature infinity pool he had created.

I quietly called Chris and we had to cover the smiles on our faces. Then Lucas offered his matter-of-fact explanation...

"I'm washing my slipper!"

Lucas's Birthday

This year's birthday was a lot of fun. Chris's parents and my mom came to his school to watch him celebrate the Montessori way. He walked on a big ellipse around a candle (the "sun") three times, once for every year he's been on Earth. The kids sang a song celebrating Lucas's life and the teacher told stories and showed pictures about what he did in each of those three years. Then Lucas presented a gift for the classroom which is what they encourage us to do. He chose a book titled "The Life Cycle of a Turtle" and though he had never actually opened it before presenting it, he declared the picture inside with eggs to be his favorite and paraded around the ellipse an extra time to show it to the class.

When we came home, Lucas was awestruck and elated with the balloons and decorations. He got many great gifts (cars of course, Candyland, an abacus, books on CD and a keyboard among other things) and took it all in stride.

It was cute to see the look on his face when I brought out the cake and we sang happy birthday. He was so surprised and pleased. He felt special from morning until night and it brought us so much joy. Our little baby boy!

More Lucasisms...

"I have been working very hard with my cars. I need dessert."

In response to another parent at his school asking "you are going to be three?" the day before his birthday ...
"Not yet. Now I'm 2. And on January...(thinking)...soon, I will
be 3."
(pausing to hold up the right number of fingers each time.)

"Oh...my...goodness."

"Oh my gosh."

"I want more dessert (crying, whining) ... I want more dessert." (This, he was saying in his sleep as I was waking him up in the morning for school. We'd had cherries covered with chocolate rum sauce the night before.)

"My WORD!"

"I'm too busy." He says this whenever he doesn't want to do something. Sometimes he is legitimately busy. This has recently changed from an adamant "I'm too DIZZY!"

"Incredible."

"And that's Audrey, the most wonderful girl in the whole world." (Pointing to the blue-eyed blonde in his class picture. She does not let him hold her hand.)

"Alrighty folks...lets watch a video. We are tired. We will feel better." He is saying this right now. And he knows it's nap time.